Here I am at Camp Granada;
Camp is very entertaining
and they say we'll have some fun if it stops raining.
I went hiking with Joe Spivy,
He developed poison ivy:
You remember Leonard Skinner?
He got ptomaine pois'ning last night after dinner.
All the counc'lors hate the waiters,
And the lake has alligators:
And the head coach wants no sissies
so he reads to us from something called Ulysses.
Now I don't want this should scare you,
But my bunk-mate has malaria;
You remember Jeffrey Hardy?
They're about to organise a searching party.
Take me home, oh Mudduh, Fadduh
take me home I hate Granada;
Don't leave me out in the forest, where
I may get eaten by a bear.
Take me home, I promise I will not make noise,
or mess the house with other boys.
Oh please don't make me stay
I've been here one whole day.
Wait a minute, it stopped hailing,
Guys are swimming, guys are sailing!
Playing baseball, gee, that's better
Mudduh, Fadduh, kindly disregard this letter.